tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59110334934576041042024-03-04T20:11:32.317-08:00Marcia StraussAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-43041742631286756492014-12-07T18:35:00.002-08:002014-12-07T18:37:54.959-08:00Yes...Long Overdue<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I could never have guessed when I did my August post that it would be December before I would write again. Such are the realities of working full time, especially for a quinquagenerian! (your new word for the day ;-)<br />
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Last spring when I knew it would soon be time to look for full time work, I began praying, "Lord, please give me something bigger than myself, something worth waking up for. As the summer progressed, I suspected that would be a downtown job in an office where people needed Jesus.But on Saturday, August 2nd, I opened an email inviting me to fill a role in SIM International on a newly created task force to facilitate new initiatives. My plan had been to begin full time job search on Monday, August 4th - God's timing clearly got my attention as no one in SIM knew that had been my plan. Over the next two weeks, I prayed and sought godly counsel and sensed God's confirmation. I felt a little bit like Peter who headed back to his fishing boat after Jesus' resurrection, but Jesus said, "Nope, I've got another job for you."<br />
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I flew to Charlotte for orientation and to meet the rest of the task force. The welcome was so very warm, it felt like coming home. I was excited at the new challenges ahead of me and humbled by the grace that handed me such meaningful kingdom work. Fresh grief hit as well as I realized that I was truly <i>launching</i> without Steve. But I knew he was smiling, ("I told you so.") as he always thought I should go back to SIM.<br />
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God once again proves himself <span style="text-align: center;"><b>Faithful</b>, </span></div>
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<span style="text-align: center;"> a </span><span style="text-align: center;"><b>Rewarder</b> of those who seek him,</span></div>
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<span style="text-align: center;"> the <b>Lifter</b> of all who are bowed down.</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-63539318540788427112014-08-22T19:01:00.001-07:002014-08-22T19:01:17.236-07:00Of Toilets, Tasks and Treasures<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
"Oooh no, I forgot about this!" As I was cleaning the upstairs bathroom a few days before the family started arriving last month, I remembered with chagrin that the toilet had been leaking. I had <i>intended</i> to work on it right after my <i>last</i> guest left. :-/ I took it apart, clicked into a "How to" youtube video, took careful notes and headed to Home Depot.<br />
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Returning with the parts, I prayed, "Lord, I need your help on this one!" I took a deep breath and started in. Everything seemed to go into place, but of course, the real test is turning on the water. I bit my lip and frantically scanned the connections as the water rushed through the pipes. "Whew! Thank you, Lord."<br />
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And then there was the big <i>task</i> - getting Steve's books listed and packed for the Evangelical Theological College in Ethiopia. Eighteen boxes are ready for shipping. I'm just waiting for word sometime this year of a container going to Ethiopia. And lest you think I'm drowning my sorrows in wine, whiskey and vodka...I was <i>instructed</i> that these boxes were the best size and sturdiness for my purposes!<br />
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The treasure came with an all-family gathering here in Dallas at the end of July. Steve's mom and my parents joined us as well to meet the two new great grand-babies. I soaked in the delightful chaos of a full house for one week.<br />
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God is <i>with</i> me. Whether it's a plumbing problem or the longing for family, he's meeting every need in his timing.<br />
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Oh, and speaking of meeting <i>every</i> need...God has orchestrated my future in a way that has me in awe of his goodness. But that will have to wait for the next post. Thanks for your prayers.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-27233889242846321542014-07-13T19:01:00.000-07:002014-07-13T19:01:35.940-07:00The Last Tough One<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I knew I had one more place I needed to <i>process</i>, but I kept putting it off. I just didn't feel ready.<br />
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Throughout the year I have very intentionally traveled to places and spent time with people in order to eliminate potential "grief triggers" or awkward moments with people in future days. I didn't want there to be a place or a person that I avoided. One place remained, and it was an easy walk away - the oncology center where Steve was treated.<br />
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One morning a week and a half ago, I knew it was time. I asked the Lord to make happen whatever needed to happen to help me keep moving forward. I couldn't have guessed what he had in store.<br />
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I spent time in the chapel on the first floor and then went up to the chemo floor. Lastly, the elevator doors opened to the floor where Steve had his weekly blood draw and appointment with his oncologist. I did a slow walk through two waiting rooms that were all too familiar. I knew this wasn't the time or place to dwell on the memories, so I turned to leave. As I did, I looked up to see Steve's oncologist standing in front of me - we both registered surprise! He graciously invited me into a quiet room where we spent 10-15 minutes in meaningful conversation about Steve and events since his passing. I left with tears flowing, but feeling both free of heart and awed that God would orchestrate this very unexpected encounter.<br />
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God<i> is</i> walking this journey <i>with</i> me, and his unanticipated blessings continue to bring healing.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-46219258325765769712014-06-23T19:36:00.000-07:002014-06-23T19:36:30.424-07:00Grandma is smiling! <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<b>Stephen Parker Strauss</b> was born on Tuesday, June 17, 2014 (the day before his due date) at 6:39 p.m. Mark and Amy are happily adjusting to a very new normal. We thank God for a safe birth and healthy baby.<br />
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5 days old</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-54689218471239275492014-06-15T19:34:00.000-07:002014-06-15T19:34:49.554-07:00June 11 Reflections<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Early Wednesday morning, I grabbed my Bible and hymnbook and headed to the cemetery about a half hour away. I hadn't been there since the burial service and wasn't sure how I would react. I'm sure your prayers made a difference.<br />
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It was a beautiful morning and a recent rain had <i>greened up</i> the grounds nicely. I sat on a mat beside the marker and prayed through hymns and read I Corinthians 15 for little over an hour. It was a comforting time with the Lord, a quiet peace held my heart. Considering that I'd polished off a full roll of TP in the preceding three days, it was quite amazing that I only needed one Kleenex in that hour!<br />
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One hymn that struck new meaning for me was one of Steve's favorites: <i>And Can it Be? </i>(And he always sang it with gusto.) The verses depict God's work of salvation, but as I read verses 3 & 4 I pictured Steve leaving his cancer-wracked body of death and entering the throne room of God, radiantly dressed in Jesus righteousness!<br />
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<i>Long my imprisoned spirit lay, fast bound in sin and nature's night.</i><br />
<i>Thine eye diffused a quick'ning ray; I woke - the dungeon flamed with light!</i><br />
<i>My chains fell off, my heart was free, I rose, went forth, and followed Thee.</i><br />
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<i>No condemnation now I dread; Jesus, and all in Him, is mine!</i><br />
<i><b>Alive</b> in Him, my living Head, and clothed in righteousness divine,</i><br />
<i>Bold I approach the eternal throne, and claim the crown, thru Christ my own.</i><br />
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<i>Amazing love! How can it be that Thou, my God shouldst die for me!</i><br />
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Another thought that struck me during that hour...How then will <i><b>I</b></i> live? It's sobering to see your name written on a grave stone. I don't know what year will be etched in that stone below my name, but I long to finish well. May God grace us all with an urgency to<i> throw off everything that hinders and...entangles us and...run with perseverance the race marked out for us.</i><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-51525157437323206472014-06-08T19:42:00.000-07:002014-06-08T19:42:46.239-07:00W.I.D.O.W.S.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Early one morning I was lying in bed asking the Lord to help me <i>get over</i> this word. I was still choking on it, my whole body tensing whenever I anticipated the word coming out of someone's mouth. Even now, when I check the circle for <i>Marital Status</i> on a form, there is still the thought, "This can 't be real." It wasn't <i>in the plan</i> to be in this category of women.<br />
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But here I am - a widow.<br />
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"Lord, help me re-frame this word." I mused on it throughout the morning and settled on this: Widows are women "<b>W</b>alking <b>I</b>n <b>D</b>ependence <b>O</b>n a <b>W</b>onderful <b>S</b>avior." How quickly I relax now and even smile as my mind shifts to this acronym. The dark sadness of the word is replaced with comfort and security.<br />
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And that comfort lifted my heart as I spent a week in Chicago at the end of May, the last of my grief-processing<i> </i>trips. I walked down <i>memory lane</i> on the campus of Trinity International University (where Steve did his doctoral studies) and our church nearby. I relished blessed re-connections with many friends and extended family. My <i>Wonderful Savior</i> fed and restored my soul in different ways with each visit.<br />
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And now I'm back in Dallas - no more trips planned. But there is a big upcoming event - Amy will be delivering our first grandson sometime in the next two weeks or so. Amy is definitely hoping it will be <i>sooner than later</i>!<br />
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Mark & Amy</div>
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Thank you for your prayers for them, Cara and Mache, David and Ryan and me as we anticipate this Wednesday, June 11th - Steve's arrival day in heaven. </div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-64270317238845354902014-05-24T13:06:00.001-07:002014-05-24T13:06:35.612-07:00Feeling Stronger...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I'm not yet Rocky surging up the monument steps with pounding rhythms spurring me on, but when I look at where I was six months ago, I can see God's restoration work.<br />
<br />
Too tired for emotions after 19 1/2 hours of door-to-door travel from Bolivia on April 30th, I was just glad to be home. I felt disoriented for the first few days. I had packed away much of my stuff to make room for the family that lived in my home while I was gone. I still haven't found some things!<br />
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Three days after return: I head to the graduation celebration for the wives of D.T.S. students, my first time back on campus. I reach for the door handle of the building where the event is being held and WHAM! - I see Steve opening this door and climbing the steps to his third floor office. I see students engaging him. I hear his voice echo in the open stairwell...I want so badly to bolt! And yet, I want to be here too. This is a special day for women I know. I head for the rest room and try to get composure. Loving faculty wives offer hugs and words of encouragement and by the time the wives show up, I'm fragile, but can interact and enjoy this time of honoring them and the Lord's faithfulness to them through these stressful years. <i> </i><br />
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But what was I going to do about <i>next </i>Saturday? I called on family and close friends to pray. Mark was graduating from D.T.S. on Saturday, and we were both aware it could be a very emotional time. Tears spilled for both of us as the ceremony began, but we quickly embraced the joyful focus on God's faithfulness to bring 380 men and women to complete their studies. I was a proud mama (!), and I knew Steve was smiling as a part of that <i>cloud of witnesse</i>s as well. <br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-84428286033171800342014-04-23T19:22:00.002-07:002014-04-23T19:22:54.000-07:00Closing Out My Days Here<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
In my cozy Alpaca-wool sweater, my legs snuggled under a down comforter and listening to the tinsel-clink of tiny hail on my bedroom window, I grin thinking that a week from today I'll be <i>hoping</i> it's cool enough to open my windows at night. I had my last Spanish lesson today, enjoyed a traditional Bolivian BBQ on Saturday with the family and look forward to seeing a professional dance troupe perform Bolivian traditional dances this weekend (my Spanish teacher is one of the dancers!).<br />
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This time in Bolivia has been a reminder that life is good, even with its pain. It hasn't provided a respite from grief, as I'm finding that often the sweetest joys unearth profound grief. But the stimulation of a new challenge, the ever-present antics of a two-year old, the soft warmth of a newborn nestled in my arms have been the <i>green pastures</i> and <i>still waters</i> that my Shepherd is using to restore my soul.<br />
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Thank you for your continued prayers and encouraging notes. God's faithfulness expressed through so many of you is a great comfort.<br />
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Have to share a few of my favorite photos from this week. :-)<br />
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Zoe</div>
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Ariana</div>
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Cara, Mache, Zoe and Ariana</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-55571698670367130912014-04-05T18:58:00.000-07:002014-04-05T18:58:44.763-07:00Busy Days for Grandma!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Yes, I've been slow on this update...there's been just a few other things to do around here. :-) Zoe Strauss Contreras arrived at 5:30 a.m. on Friday, March 28th, weighing in at a petite 6 lbs. Like her sister, Zoe never descended and engaged, so after 11 hours of labor (Cara's determination to have Zoe naturally), the doctor called for a C-section. We thank God for his protection as Cara said all the medical people around her exclaimed, "Oh, just in time!" as they lifted Zoe out. The pediatrician said labor had been a bit rough on her, but he expected her to be back to normal in 24 hours. And sure enough, after keeping a gentle flow of oxygen near her face, the next day she was nursing with vigor. Cara is sore, moving slowly, but recovering well.<br />
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The first hours<br />
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Ariana's first look at her sister</div>
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Peaceful slumber at home</div>
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Much happiness all around<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-4896018431149293912014-03-13T13:42:00.002-07:002014-03-13T13:42:27.625-07:00An Unexpected Connection<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
The day before the 3 1/2 day retreat I was feeling restless, anxious over trivial things, distracted...I decided to cancel class, fast and spend the better part of the day with the Lord. He graciously restored peace and a restful dependence on the Spirit. I prayed for the retreat, but I don't think I prayed much in regards to <i>me</i> and the retreat. Since the retreat would all be in Spanish, I didn't have much expectation in regards to its impact on me. But God....<br />
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At tea time the first morning, I sat with a group of women, mostly listening. I was impressed with an especially vibrant and attractive mother of two pre-teen girls. Eventually, she moved closer to me and patiently engaged me in conversation. A few hours later, I told Cara about <i>Katia, </i>and Cara told me her story.<br />
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Seven years ago, Katia and her husband, Tito, with their three and five year old girls joined the church family on this same weekend retreat. Tito was a pastoral intern at the church, a sharp young leader with energy and vision. While crossing the bridge to the camp, one of their pieces of luggage fell into the river. He was a strong swimmer, so he went down to the bank and swam around a bend to retrieve it. He never returned. His body was found six days later.<br />
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As Cara relayed the story, I suddenly realized that I had prayed for this young mother and her two little girls seven years ago when the news came to the SIM International office where I worked. We grieved the tragic loss of this young family and the church family as well. I would <i>never</i> have guessed that one day God would intersect my life with hers.<br />
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That night and early the next morning I wrestled, churning emotionally and begging God to bring sense and order to my racing thoughts. Again and again he brought scripture to mind that addressed the issues over which was I struggling. I knew I needed to talk to Katia, but it was a few days before I was ready.<br />
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Cara joined us to help translate, but only a few times was it necessary. Katia teaches in French, and she does quite well in English too! It was a precious heart to heart time. All three of us were a red-eyed, balling mess before we concluded, but it was a Spirit-directed, edifying time. Katia is the close-up photo of 2 Corinthians 1. The comfort and strength that God has given her is now <i>overflowing </i> to comfort me in my time of grief. God had this in the works seven years ago.<br />
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Katia is leading a women's group called "Women Alone" for women who are single (for whatever reason). Cara tells me that in this city of one million people, she doesn't know of any church that has a group like it. Katia's daughters are maturing in the Lord, and Katia assured me that she is not just surviving, but thoroughly thriving, even as she still grieves Tito's absence.<br />
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I had a tiny part in lifting up this young widow seven years ago, and now God brings us together and uses her to encourage and minister to me in my grief as a widow. God's timing and his design of the Body of Christ once again amazes me.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-37663804040257207002014-02-28T18:50:00.001-08:002014-02-28T18:50:41.088-08:00Brain-dead by noon...but thriving! <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I've had a few confusing times with taxis and some mis-communication at the house (ate some of the meat and rice in the frig - found out it was the dog's food). I've had a few grief-meltdowns, and I am still struggling to keep my eyes open after 8:30 p.m., but in answer to your prayers, I'm thriving.<br />
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Each morning, I walk out to the street to catch a taxi into center-city and meet with my tutor at the language institute for an intense 1 1/2 - 2 hours. Some days I stay for a few more hours and memorize a short script in Spanish. The large and beautiful plaza a block away is full of students and others of all ages, most of whom are happy to humor this <i>gringa </i>as she stumbles through her short monologue. If I don't have time for the plaza, I hit the streets near home - the goal is to talk to twenty people. By the time I slump into a return taxi, I can hardly think in English, let alone Spanish...absolutely brain-numb! But dinner at 1:00 with Mache, Cara and Ariana, a short <i>siesta</i> and some quiet time with the Lord restores me for another 2-3 hours of study. I try to push through emails at night, but sometimes it's a lost cause.<br />
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So how do I know I'm thriving? Because when I wake up the next morning, I'm excited about doing it again. The <i>Charades</i> and <i>Pictionary</i> mode of communication is giving way to actual conversations with my host, Lila. I'm quite tickled with the progress.<br />
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So thank you for your prayers. God is answering. Tomorrow morning I head out to a church retreat at a camp where I'll be dorm-rooming with 20 Spanish-speaking sisters. I figure if the immersion experience gets to be a little too much, I can skip some meetings because Ariana <i>needs her grandma. :-)</i></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-23535500700428910872014-02-16T16:03:00.000-08:002014-02-16T16:03:35.146-08:00Spring in Bolivia<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
After several weather-delays and an all night flight, I arrived in La Paz, Bolivia Thursday morning. At 12,000 feet I spent a low-key day enjoying family, walking <i>very</i> slowly up stairs and occasionally sucking in air from an oxygen tank. The next day Cara and I hopped a taxi to the center of town, and I registered for 50 hours of Spanish lessons with a tutor. My plan is to couple them with my Rosetta Stone lessons each weekday, so tomorrow is grandma's <i>first day of school</i>.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixNkarhV1LhVeyg3MI2BzNvVXxA-LOyIboLeWdgCwS5Oe6D-Bld0Pu1YIguWkK5_twySqMgAMpc1x1t-YKl_3iDHKB4zrnTs0jEAKWWP5WTBNrvkjbcl2NsCKO7Jje-vk7GT5ARCRcS5Q/s1600/014+02+16b+cropped,+reduced.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixNkarhV1LhVeyg3MI2BzNvVXxA-LOyIboLeWdgCwS5Oe6D-Bld0Pu1YIguWkK5_twySqMgAMpc1x1t-YKl_3iDHKB4zrnTs0jEAKWWP5WTBNrvkjbcl2NsCKO7Jje-vk7GT5ARCRcS5Q/s1600/014+02+16b+cropped,+reduced.jpg" height="320" width="259" /></a>Of course, each day's highlight since arrival has been enjoying the gleeful antics of two-year-old Ariana. She's prepared many a cup of tea for me inside her pink castle. Right now I'm living with Ariana's other grandmother, Lila, and aunt, Carola, who live a minute's walk away. When "Zoe" arrives around March 30th, I'll move in with Mache and Cara.<br />
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God wonderfully provided a young missionary family, also expecting a baby soon, to live in my house while I'm away. In the busy weeks of preparing the house and myself for this trip, I sensed a curious underlying anxiety. It took me a few days to realize that I was apprehensive about leaving <i>my space</i> of grief, my <i>familiar</i> place of mourning. But I needn't have worried, I certainly didn't leave my grief at home! Cara and I have already had some tearful heart-to-hearts, and the Lord has tenderly met me in my hours of altitude insomnia with clear reminders from his word.<br />
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Please pray that I'll thrive as I build new relationships, refresh my love of different cultures and stretch this ol' brain in language learning.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-70117791803363780852014-02-01T05:50:00.000-08:002014-02-01T05:50:21.293-08:00The Holidays - Part 2<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<h3 style="text-align: left;">
A Gentle <i>First</i> Christmas</h3>
Christmas in Charleston, SC was the right choice. Mark and Amy (normally here in Dallas) were in Italy visiting Amy's sister, so I joined David and Ryan to celebrate with Ryan's family. I was warmly welcomed into the Graudin family gatherings and Christmas traditions.<br />
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As we waited for the Christmas Eve service to begin at St. Philip's Church (founded in 1680 and the mother church to Anglicanism in the Carolinas), David pulled up a Facebook message from one of our friends in Ethiopia who posted a photo of their Christmas Eve service. I knew our churches in Charlotte and Dallas were also worshiping together that evening. What a blessing it was to know that I was a part of thousands around the world focusing on God's gift to us, our eternal hope, our light in the darkness!Was I aching? - absolutely. This beautiful church was where Steve and Priest Hank co-officiated David and Ryan's wedding. The memories were poignant. But as I spoke the liturgy and took communion, I found comfort in belonging to not only a world-wide Body of Christ, but also a communion of saints that stretches back for centuries. Past and present, all of them have known pain, but all have found God faithful to carry them through it. Christmas ensures "God with us."<br />
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And God was with me on Christmas day. A lovely brunch in Ryan's childhood home, gift-giving around the tree and a festive dinner with Ryan's extended family filled the day. Steve was never far from my thoughts and a few times tears spilled over, but I enjoyed the day. It helped to be away from Dallas and in a different family context, and I felt loved and included. It greatly helped that Steve and Tracy (Ryan's parents) were comfortable with my tears and felt free in sharing memories of <i>my</i> Steve. Steve and Tracy also know the dream-crushing impact of cancer.Tracy and I talked freely of our longing for heaven. And so again, I found comfort in being with those who knew God's faithfulness through pain.<br />
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God gently walked me through my <i>first</i> Christmas. He is my faithful <i>Emmanuel</i>. </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-34288763501253775312014-01-12T06:17:00.000-08:002014-01-12T06:17:51.325-08:00The Holidays - Part 1<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
God's Mercies When I'm a Mess<br />
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The second weekend in December was a busy one...<br />
lengthy Saturday choir rehearsal,<br />
wedding of seminary-grad friends,<br />
wedding reception chock-full of catch-me-up visits,<br />
early rise on Sunday for choir warm-up and trio practice, <br />
Sunday morning Christmas program - uplifting worship!<br />
I felt so blessed, but...<br />
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I was spent. Each event had both filled me and drained me. I walked into my empty house and in minutes I was mess. While I ate, I grabbed a book on grief, hoping it would steer my thoughts aright. No help. I took a nap. No improvement. I took a long, hard walk, praying and crying as I circled the park.<br />
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I wanted very much to get to our community Bible study group's Christmas event that night. It had been seven weeks since I'd shared fellowship with them. Steve taught this group for almost two years, and they have loved us so faithfully and tenderly. I didn't want to miss being with them. But I was decidedly <i>not</i> ready to engage in a <i>frolicky-fun </i>Christmas party. I returned home from my walk, looked at my watch and plopped in the lazy boy. "Lord, you have fifteen minutes to pull me together and change my outlook, otherwise I stay home."<br />
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And God, in tender mercy, did it!<br />
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In those fifteen minutes, I picked up that grief book, read a short chapter, God gave me some insights and then to my amazement, he completely lifted the oppressive sorrow. I jumped up, made my appetizer and headed off to the party. The carol singing and fellowship and crazy elephant gift exchange (complete with shared memories of Steve and his competitiveness at previous exchanges!) kept my spirit smiling. I didn't <i>frolic</i>, but this loving group, who also misses Steve, drew me into the joy of the season.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-61601308347856168832013-12-18T21:24:00.002-08:002014-02-01T05:51:21.100-08:00Thirty-Seven Years Ago Today...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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I was a bride.</h3>
Knowing I would leave home early this morning for Charleston, I set aside time the last few evenings to reminisce through college scrapbooks, diary excerpts, love letters and our wedding photos. I chuckled through the relational maneuvering of two strong-willed first-borns on a small college campus (yes, I'll admit I was the more stubborn of the two). I lingered over the tender expressions of early love. I delighted in the network of friends that multiplied crazy-fun memories. And I thanked God for the over-the-top joy we shared with family and friends as we made our covenant of love and faithfulness on December 18, 1976.<br />
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It hasn't been a tear-less day, but God's grace-gifts have lifted my spirits. The first came on the two hour plane trip here. I read through <i>The Revelation</i> - yea, not exactly <i>cheerful</i> reading material. But it strengthened me to read again that GOD WINS! The King returns in power and glory, and we'll never again know tears, pain, suffering or death. And yes, I will once again know the over-the-top joy of being a<i> bride.</i><br />
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The second gift came after a delicious enchilada dinner David prepared for Ryan and me. The three of us took off for the beach and got there just in time to watch a spectacular pumpkin-orange moon rise over the ocean. I was shivering with cold, but stood transfixed as the rising moon slowly created a shimmering path from the horizon to the beach, glowing increasingly white as it ascended. God's creative glory on display left little room for sad thoughts.<br />
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So I go to sleep tonight with happy thoughts of being a bride, both in the past and in the glorious days to come!</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-14555653024687702192013-12-06T13:33:00.000-08:002013-12-06T13:33:50.911-08:00God's Equipping in the Uncertainties<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Many have asked me, “So what’s ahead?” And my usual
answer is, “I don’t have a clue.” God has given me the privilege of a year to
work through my grief and prepare for the future. I’m praying for his
guidance and for preparation both of my heart and in practical skills, and I
saw a specific answer to that prayer in Ethiopia.</div>
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Background: Over the course of Steve’s illness, I found I
lost my ability to memorize scripture. It just would not <i>stick</i> in my brain, so
I continued my through-the-Bible reading and dug deep into the Psalms and
prayer. Oddly, just two weeks after Steve transferred to heaven, I realized my
mind was clear, and I could memorize again. I felt desperate for a renewed
vision of ministry, because for 36 years we've been a team, serving together was our DNA as a couple. What would ministry look like now? How could I even look forward it? </div>
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For this reason, I chose 2 Corinthians 2:14-6:10. I finished memorizing it in mid-September, by the end of my trip out east. I've been meditating on it nearly daily since that time. When I arrived in Ethiopia, I found out that John Piper and Jason Meyer were speaking at a conference hosted by ETC (Evangelical Theological College where Steve taught). I debated about going since I had so many people to see in three short weeks, but in the end I decided that I might meet up with many of Steve's former students and that maybe God was blessing me with a spiritual retreat. </div>
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I didn't know what their topic was until Jason Meyer announced in the first session that they would be covering 2 Corinthians chapters 1-5. I couldn't hold back the tears - God is intent on equipping me. He really wants me to <i>get</i> this passage! I still don't know what is ahead, but God is clearly at work getting me ready for his surprise package. Thank you for praying for my future - God is answering! </div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-2648306409611824162013-11-25T08:17:00.001-08:002013-11-25T08:17:59.628-08:00Ethiopia in Retrospect<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
My plan was to update this journal each week while in Ethiopia, but my opportunities to connect to the internet were few and when available, short-lived. So, rather than give you the mother-load, I'll write this in mini-series form.<br />
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<b>Some things never change</b>...<br />
<br />
All my travel went smoothly. I settled into my small, attic-story, SIM guesthouse apartment, rested a short while and then took off on foot to see some of the city (huffing a bit at 7500 feet). I'm amazed at the changes even since we were here 2+ years ago. The entrepreneurial spirit is ALIVE(!): new restaurants, hotels, hundreds of new apartment blocks and condominiums, vastly improved roads and even a light rail system, expected to be in operation in less than 2 years. It's hard for me to recognize areas of town because my landmarks no longer exist.<br />
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But in all the changes, I've been blessed to find that many things have <i>not</i> changed: generous hospitality, the warm cheek to cheek greetings, the priority of relationships, and the deep and loyal love of friends. These treasures have filled my heart in these weeks. Connections over coffee and unhurried conversations over meals kept me hopping on taxis all over the city. It has been as important for our friends to grieve with me as for me to grieve with them. And teary eyes gave way to smiles as I pulled Steve-stories out of them.<br />
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A memorable time of story-telling came one evening during my first week when the Kale Heywot Church Central Office (denominational headquarters) invited me to a lovely dinner and time of honoring Steve. The tributes/memories ranged from Steve's impact in the classroom to his response to loudly snoring hotel-mates at conferences. A few days later, I spoke during their chapel hour and stories and words of encouragement and exhortation again spilled over me. Each time they prayed passionately for God's comfort and guidance as I move forward.<br />
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I shared with them the impact <i>their</i> lives had on <i>us</i>. It was watching the Ethiopian church walk through the pain-filled years of communism that changed Steve and I. Christians had no political power, no social standing, no human resource to bring relief, <b>but</b> they knew their God was sovereign over all. God wove into the fabric of our souls their model of dependent prayer and faith through great trials, and unquestionably their example impacted how we walked through this last year and half of life-with-cancer. <br />
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God is so worthy of my awe and never-ceasing joy - his masterful formation of the Body of Christ brings life-changing interdependence even across cultures! Bless the Lord, O my soul!<br />
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<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5911033493457604104.post-49333988537031756132013-10-29T20:42:00.001-07:002013-10-29T20:42:25.754-07:00Singing a Prayer of My Heart<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Wednesday night I slipped into the church sanctuary alone and practiced the song below, then sat down in the pew where we usually sat. I wept as I looked up at the platform where he used to sit adding rich brass tones to our congregational singing. I grieved that on Sunday when I finished my solo, I would not come down to sit with him, have him reach over and squeeze my hand and whisper, "Good job." But I also gave thanks: for a husband who loved to worship, who shared many wonderful music ministry moments with me, who encouraged and taught me. And I thanked God that he wasn't finished using me in service for him and asked that as I sang this prayer on Sunday, he would edify this Body of Christ which has so lavishly loved me. To God's glory alone, I was able to sing with a steady voice throughout. It expresses my heart.<br />
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Jesus, Draw me every nearer,<br />
As I labor through the storm,<br />
You have called me to this passage,<br />
And I'll follow, though I'm worn.<br />
<br />
<u>Chorus</u><br />
May this journey bring a blessing,<br />
May I rise on wings of faith,<br />
And at the end of my heart's testing,<br />
With Your likeness, let me wake.<br />
<br />
Jesus, guide me through the tempest,<br />
Keep my spirit stayed and sure,<br />
When the midnight meets the morning,<br />
Let me love You even more. <u>Chorus</u><br />
<br />
Let the treasures of the trial<br />
Form within me as I go,<br />
And at the end of this long passage,<br />
Let me leave them at your throne. <u>Chorus</u><br />
<u><br /></u>
Keith and Kristyn Getty </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05387977769758263891noreply@blogger.com7